Loneliness
By Jonathan Mitchell
A search in Young's Analytical Concordance for the KJV reveals that this version of the Bible did not use either the word "lone," nor the word "loneliness." Yet this emotion, or feeling, seems to be prevalent in our world, today. In Gen. 2:18, Yahweh said, "It is not good that the man should be alone, I will make him a helper as his partner" (NRSV).
The existence of marriage and raising families is ubiquitous in both Old and New Testaments, as well as in all cultures of humanity. Yet, even within families, and between couples, loneliness seems to be a universal occurrence for people, at one time or another. Why does this sometimes happen, or in some cases be a condition throughout one's life?
In the late 1960's, Ray Stevens wrote the song, "Isn't It Lonely Together." It is not uncommon to hear of someone feeling alone within the midst of a crowd. It seems to be the occurrence of an emotional disconnect. There can be many reasons for experiencing this feeling.
The KJV does use the word, "alone." In Ps. 102:7 we read,
"I watch, and am as a sparrow, alone upon the housetop."
But does being alone equate to being lonely? In this Psalm, the word alone means "to be separate." This same idea can be observed in Hos. 8:
"Israel is swallowed up. Now shall they be among the Gentiles as a vessel, wherein is no pleasure - for they are gone up to Assyria - a wild ass alone by himself..." (vss. 8-9a; KJV).
The idea of being alone is frequently found in both Testaments, but the occurrences do not express the emotion of being "lonely." One exception might be unpacked from Jn. 8:29a,
"And further, the (or: This) One sending Me is constantly (or: continuously exists being) with Me. He does not leave Me alone (or: He did not send Me off alone; He does not let Me go away alone; He does not divorce or abandon Me)."
But might Jesus, experiencing being human, have felt lonely? During His earthly ministry, His disciples did not really understand Him nor really see who He was. Such relationships are often the source of our own loneliness. The disciples knew Him as their Lord, Master, Teacher and Rabbi, but they did not really know Him. Even though His Father was always with Him, as a human being (tested in all points as we are - Heb. 4:15) He must have at times felt lonely.
A person can feel lonely due to feeling that he or she is in some way different from other people. A person can feel lonely because of feeling that others do not really "see" the deep, inner being that one knows to be his true self. A person can feel lonely because people do not seek to engage his or her deeper person. A person can feel lonely from feeling an absence of true friends. A person can feel lonely from a perception of not feeling "desired." A person can feel lonely due to having different belief systems, political views, or moral landscapes. These all can be experienced on various levels of our lives and psyches.
Does awareness of our union with God displace or compensate for the feeling of loneliness? Consider the frustration of Jesus when His disciples did not understand what He was teaching them, or when they could not stay awake with Him during His gut-wrenching trial regarding His Father's will, in Gethsemane.
"Now Jesus, giving a discerning reply, said, 'O faithless generation that is void of trust, as well as being one that has been thoroughly twisted and distorted! Until what time (Till when; = How long) will I continue being with you folks? Until what time will I, Myself, continue holding you people up?'" (Mat. 17:17)
Perhaps a realization of our spiritual union with God (1 Cor. 6:17) can ease or dissipate the feeling of loneliness. Paul instructs us,
"And further, whether one member is continuing to experience the effect of something, or constantly undergoes suffering, all the members continually experience the effect or the suffering together with [it; her; him]; or if a member is being constantly glorified, normally given an assumed appearance, or is progressively receiving a good reputation, all the members are continuously rejoicing together with [him; her; it]" (1 Cor. 12:26).
Empathy certainly engages our emotions in a kind of union with the experiences of others, but does this sort of connection relieve our personal sense of loneliness, if we are experiencing this at the same time that we empathize with the situation or condition of someone else? The common saying that "misery loves company" offers the insight that folks often do not want to be "alone" when in a miserable situation.
Now perhaps Paul's words in Col. 3 can lead us out of any feelings of loneliness:12. Therefore, as God's chosen, set-apart folks, even ones having been loved, and still being loved (or: God's sacred, loved and selected people; or: as picked-out, elect ones from God - holy folks having been accepted and now being affected by This Urge toward Reunion), put on and clothe yourselves with (or: enter within; envelope yourselves within) bowels (internal organs; = the tender parts; seat of deep feelings and empathies) of compassion (= tender affections of a gentle, gracious disposition), kindness (adaptable usefulness), humility (the minding and disposition of things of lowness or of low station), gentleness (meekness; mildness), waiting long before rushing with emotions (even-temperedness; long-suffering; patient putting up with people or situations; pushing anger far away),
13. being folks continuously holding up [things or situations] pertaining to one another (or: habitually holding yourselves up, belonging to one another; constantly putting up with one another) and incessantly giving grace to or doing a favor for (dealing graciously with and among) yourselves, if ever anyone may continue having (or: holding) a complaint toward someone. Just and along the same line as, and proportionally as, and to the same degree as, the Lord [= Christ or Yahweh; some MSS: Christ; Aleph* & some Vulgate MSS read: God] also gave (or: gives) Grace to and Favor for you (deals graciously in, with and among you folks), thus also you folks [do the same].
14. Now upon (or: added to) all these things [put on; superimpose] the Love, which continues being (or: is) a joining link and uniting band of perfection (a tie which binds together and pertains to the goal of maturity, being the result of fruitfulness; [the] fastening connection and binding factor of the completeness of the finished product; [the] bond producing perfection and destiny; a binding conjunction which brings union, which is the goal).
15. Furthermore, let the Peace of, and the Joining from, the Christ (belonging to and originating in the [Messiah]; the harmony which is the Anointing [other MSS: God]) continuously umpire (act as a judge in the games; [thus, presuming a previous environment of conflict]) within your hearts (= in union with the core of your being) - into which [peace and joining] you folks are called (were called; were invited), within one body. And progressively come to be thankful people (or: continue becoming folks expressing gratitude for the goodness, ease and well-being that comes in the goodness of grace; be habitually graceful folks).
These verses address the issues of our emotions and of our interactions with other people, and then carries these ideas to Love, which is a "joining link and a uniting band of maturity," and which, along with Christ's Peace, joins us together.
Another formulation of similar thinking is found in 1 Jn. 1:7,
"Yet if we keep on walking about (= continue living and ordering our life) within the midst of, in union with, and in the sphere of, the Light, as He exists (or: is) within this Light, we [note: i.e., God and us] constantly have common being and existence (or: hold common fellowship, participation, and enjoy partnership) reciprocally with one another, and the blood ['ritual detergent' - J. Milgrom] of, from, and which is, Jesus, His Son, keeps on, and is repeatedly, cleansing us (or: is progressively rendering us pure) from every sin (or: from all error, failure, deviation, mistake, and from every shot that is off target [when it occurs]). [cf Rev. 1:5]
Here, John is encouraging us to live our lives in union with the Light (Christ), which calls to mind Jesus' word about abiding, or dwelling, in Him (the Vine; Jn. 15:1ff).
And then, there is Phil. 2:
2. [then] fill my joy full, so that you folks can be continually having the same frame of mind (would be mutually disposed; may have the same opinion; could mind the same thing; [cf 1 Pet. 3:8]), by habitually holding (or: having) the same Love: folks joined together in soul (inner life of feelings, will, heart and mind; consciousness), in continuously minding The One (or: habitually holding one opinion; constantly thinking one thing; regularly disposed to one [purpose]; [other MSS: the same])
As God's Spirit empowers us to incorporate this new reality into our lives, might not we feel less lonely? Take note of vs. 2: "by habitually holding (or: having) the same Love: folks joined together in soul (inner life of feelings, will, heart and mind; consciousness), in continuously minding The One." Yes, being that God is Love, Love is the answer. Love joins us together, and as we live in this joined sphere, loneliness can dissipate. The world is a "lonely planet." May we broadcast God (Love) into it, as we live our daily lives.
Jonathan
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